Welcome
Pro Status
No Expiration
Help Decide
Archive Calendar
Blogroll
No Expiration
Written on July 1st, 2009
My mom, MotherFury (MF) and I were sitting by the pool drinking margaritas and beer.
EF: Mom, hand me those sunglasses, would ya?
Mom: Is the sun in your eyes?
EF: No, Jan’s white fucking legs are killing me.
(hearty laughter)
EF: Okay, MF, now you can make fun of me for wearing shorts instead of a bikini bottom.
MF: Why? Nothing wrong with the shorts. It’s the fat ass hanging out of them that’s making me burp.
Written on July 1st, 2009
We had a really good time, but damn, it’s good to be home. I have countless loads of laundry to do, and like Blackbird just said, “I feel like I need a vacation after my vacation.”
It will be nice to sleep on good pillows tonight.
Mom, if you’re reading this, please don’t take that as criticism.
Take it as a flat out, intentional insult. 
I don’t know when she started stuffing pillows with hundreds of magazine inserts, but as thrifty as the idea is, they really aren’t very soothing.
The irony is that her guest bed is FABULOUS. Soooo comfy and downy and yummy I could take big bites out of the mattress.
I suspect she keeps the shitty pillows so that we won’t stay too long.
Anyway, we had a ball and Matt had a great golf lesson with my dad. Dad reported that he had never before seen such a slice as the one my husband shot. He wasn’t being insulting–just sort of amazed. He got the ball onto an entirely different fairway.
We got to see Jahm for a while, but I fear the sight of me in a bathing suit (sort of) either damaged his eyes or his colon, so that was the last we saw of him. I totally understand. How the hell does he think I feel? I have to see that shit every damn day.
Autumn had a blast at camp, but she is worn the fuck out.
I predict an early bedtime for all of us tonight.
Hey, how cool is it that the link Matt put on WHAS11 regarding Dr. Nether Regions generated like twelve visitors to the site???? Check it out if you haven’t seen em–on the entry about how loyal I am.
Actually, it was way more than 12, but those were the ones who commented.
I’m off to get our shit in order–I’ll get caught up later.
Luna and Larry, you both did a fine job!!!!!!! As Sammi would say, “Muuuaaahhh.”
Evilfury