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Written on August 31st, 2009
I noticed Rebel has been MIA for a while, but I didn’t realize she had deleted her blog?? I had heard that she deleted some posts, but I didn’t know she was splitting for good.
What the hell is up with that???? Someone fill me in, please. And, if you are in touch with her, please tell her I said “hey” and that she is missed.
Written on August 31st, 2009
KoP is one of my all time faves, and he was my SecretSanta last year. He’s one of those guys who doesn’t annoy anyone, or start any trouble, or ruffle any feathers. Ever.
He is chill, and cool, and a great friend.
Besides being the badest ass EVER (seriously, if he and Snow had a child, that kid would be a freaking super hero) he is a talented musician, as well as a gifted sand castle architect. 
Great husband, great dad, great guy—KoP is all that and a bag of chips, and it’s my honor to have him as a friend.
Happy Birthday, my man. I hope this is the best year you ever had.
Written on August 30th, 2009
Our friend Lisa works in the middle school in my parents’ town, and every year she compiles a list of unusual names to share with her friends.
These are kids who actually attend the school–not just names she has heard about.
Runner up: Ijuana Tequila.
And the winner of the most ridiculous name of the 2009-2010 school year is….
**drumroll**
A’Blessing Iz-Real.
Written on August 28th, 2009
Y’all are killing us with the ad clicking.
I don’t want to nag, and I make jokes about having to nag, and I REALLY appreciate those of you who nag FOR us. But, for the last three weeks we have averaged 12 clicks a day. 12! A day!!! I realize it has been slow here– a lot of active members are gone (like Steve–he is in NYC at his brother’s wedding) and poor Westy is in the hospital.
I forget sometimes, too. I get online, and figure I’ll get to the ad at some point during the day. Some days, I realize I never did get around to it.
I understand, yo.
But, y’all, it is CRUCIAL to the site. If Matt doesn’t get the Google money for the ads, he will pull the plug. He already paid cash (out of our vacation fund) for the servers that should ensure KCL never goes down for more than a minute or two, no matter what. We are still trying to recoup that, and our outrageous internet bill is not getting any smaller. He is not trying to MAKE money. He just wants to have half of the internet paid. That is not gonna happen with 12 clicks a day, guys.
I don’t want to see the site shut down any more than y’all do, and Matt does NOT want to shut it down. He got the birthday calendar up today (on his lunch break, thank you very much) and was going to start work on Pastor Larry’s kudos, but instead is going to work on raising pro rates. That is our only chance, at this point, to keep the joint running without going into debt. I love you guys, but we are NOT going into debt for you. Pro will be raised beginning Sept 1st, or maybe a little later. I think he is thinking $3 a month, and $25 per year. Still cheaper than JS was, and with that, you get polls, the friends only option, and security of knowing your shit is private.
Birthdays, of course, will be KCL wide, whether you are pro or not, and I hope you all enter your bdays in the calendar on the homepage. He will have an ACTUAL calendar up this weekend that will show the 5 upcoming birthdays, so we will all know in advance and none of you will be bothered with my shitty group email attempts. I apologize again for any annoyance that caused you–I just wanted to make sure everyone was celebrated on their day and no one was left out.
Please, y’all. Click the ads.
I am going to ask Matt to keep moving this entry up to the top over the weekend, because we will be gone and I want to make sure everyone reads it. Hell, at this point, it may be my last entry for a while. You may have to find your stupid bullshit elsewhere.
This is me asking nicely: Click. the. ads.
Every day.
Don’t assume everyone else is doing it.
Just ONE a day–only once every 24 hours is registered. That is all we are asking.
Please don’t comment saying you always click the ads–I forget, too, so just don’t comment.
I care about each and every one of you (yes, even YOU, Pandora, even if you hate me) and I do NOT want to lose touch again.
WE just can’t afford it without the Google payments. Period.
Written on August 28th, 2009
John shared a few stories about his stupid students and I felt I should return the favor by telling y’all about another note sent home by Autumn’s teacher:
“Please bare with me. We was going to start Thursday homework, but won’t not until next week.”
Something tells me JOHN does not send notes like that one to parents.
Written on August 26th, 2009
Three years, honey.
They’ve been the best years of my life, and it just gets better all the time. You make me so incredibly happy, Matt. Every day that I wake up with you is like a little holiday.
You are such a fantastic father, and the girls are stable, healthy, and happy because of your influence. They never had a “dad” before, but now they do, and they know that you are there for them. Like last night, when Laurel’s tooth was so painfully loose. When we were walking home from the bus stop she started to ask if I would pull it, then caught herself and said, “I’ll just wait until Matty gets home.”
You know, of course, how Brad lights up when you walk in the room. You were born to be a dad, and I am so grateful that I was able to give you your son.
I realize I am not the easiest person in the world to get along with. I can barely stand myself most of the time, so the fact that you not only tolerate me, but LOVE me, is an indication of your good nature.
I love you so much, Matt. You are the man of my dreams and I am so proud to be your wife.
Written on August 25th, 2009
I have failed you, Sir.
I saw the crappiest of crappy cars in the grocery store parking lot, and as usual, did not have a phone or a camera with which to document the horror.
It was a sky blue Chevette, with a plastic fan duct taped to the driver’s side door. I assume the car has no air conditioning, but probably doesn’t need it, because all the windows were covered with plastic.
I haven’t seen a Chevette since like 1989, so that in itself was surprising, but the crazy part was that this shitty car had brand spanking new rims, just as shiny as new pennies.
I’m thinking windows would be a priority, but that’s just me.
I thought about driving all the way home for my camera, but decided I will just go back later when we are running errands. It looked like it had been sitting there a while, so if luck is on my side, it will still be there and I will get a picture for you.
I’m beginning to think we live in the Stupid Car Triangle.
I will never leave the house again without phone/camera, and I will rely on you to take the photographic evidence of such stupidity and write an entry about it.
Until then, I remain your humble servant.
EF
Written on August 25th, 2009
Damn, this place is depressing! Tons of people are seriously ill, others are seriously sad, and others still have ended a long term romance with Geo. Not saying any names (cough cough Doanli cough)
I feel awful for everyone who is sick or unhappy. My heart goes out to each one of you.
For the two or three people in this joint who are NOT knocking at Death’s Door, or too depressed to see straight, can we liven this place up a little???
Laughter is the best medicine, after all.*
*second only to Vicodin
Written on August 24th, 2009
There is this chick who does the news at the top of the hour on the radio. Her name is Mindy Peterson and she Drives. Me. Crazy.
Why? Because I hate the way she pronounces her own damn name.
Yes, I realize that is unspeakably silly of me, but she drags her name out too long. “Peterson” is a longish name, sure, but say it out loud: “Peterson.” What, half a second? If even? Not the way MINDY says it. She goes, “I’m Mindy Peeeeeeeterson.”
God, it drives me nuts.
I think she is trying to drag out her air time or something, but for crying out loud, just say your name and move on with your life so I can get back to listening to the Francine Show.
Written on August 24th, 2009
We have had such a mild summer that I sort of feel like it will be all or nothing this winter. However, since we were completely blindsided by the ice storm last January I prefer to err on the side of caution and assume that we are gonna get it, but good.
Local lore tells us that if your flowers have already died off (ours have) that it will be an early, and shitty, winter. Also, the birds are already migrating south, which is another tried and true indication of a harsh season.
Y’all know what wooly worms are? Those great big caterpillars you see around this time of year? They’re like two inches long and as big around as your thumb. I’ve heard different variations on which worm means a bad winter, but the one I hear most frequently is if the worm is brown with black fuzzy stripes it means the snow is acomin’. I haven’t yet seen a wooly warm, striped or otherwise, but I am keeping my eyes peeled.
I don’t want to be one of those people who immediately rush to the store for bread and milk at the first tentative forecast of snow, but after last winter, I will probably do exactly that. We were caught SO off guard, and we were SO screwed that I vowed we would never be that helpless again.
We did get a generator during all that mess, but still, we were all confined to one room in a freezing house, and didn’t have much food. We ate a lot of hot dogs. We had very few clean, warm clothes, because I had just started a big load in the washer when the power went out. After we got the generator, I was able to use the washer just long enough to finish the load that had been started, but then had to hang all the wet clothes around the house to dry.
When your house is thirty degrees inside, clothes don’t dry very quickly. We couldn’t use the dryer because it would take too long and we could either have the dryer, or the space heater running, but not both.
So this year, I will find electric blankets. I will have an emergency stash of blankets, sweat suits, socks, and gloves. We’ll have plenty of candles and flashlights. Last year, we were searching all over the damned house for everything we needed with a weak flashlight and tea candles. Everything we will possibly need will be in the front closet for easy access. I’ll have us stocked up on baby formula, diapers, milk, bread, easy to fix microwave food, and of course, beer.
To be honest, at the end of the day it was kind of nice to all be sleeping together–cozy and warm and safe. It would have been nicer, though, if it hadn’t been so hard to finally GET that way. I don’t want to be scrambling around and using coats for blankets like it’s Angela’s Ashes or some shit.
And, this year, we are going to keep Pastor Larry on speed dial so we can go crash at his crib if necessary. He has alllllll that firewood, you see. My parents have a fireplace, too, but they were running so low on wood that they slept in my dad’s office at his college. That was another shitty thing about the storm: there was nowhere to GO. Everyone was in the same boat.
Man, did it ever suck.
Anyway, what are some of the “signs” you guys know about that are supposed to foretell the weather?? I am just superstitious enough, and put just enough stock in old wives tales to listen to what you tell me and keep my eyes open for them. With every sign I see indicating bad weather, I am buying an extra case of water. And beer.
Evilfury