Now Dig This, Baby

Nelson County School System: Chapter 2–Redemption

evilfury — Sun, 14 Mar 2010 17:13:05 +0000

I am still annoyed by all the phone/email/paper reminders about Math Night, but the superintendent did something very cool so I will not bitch about the aggravation anymore.
Remember I told you about Laurel having her picture in the paper (again)? The photo is of her working with a classmate on a 3-D project involving pretzel sticks, marshmallows and other things.
Anyway, yesterday she received a big envelope, addressed by hand.
There was a big card that read, “Nelson County Schools Newsmaker” on the cover, and on the inside of the card it said, “Your ‘good press’ is a credit to you as well as the Nelson County School System. Best wishes from the Board of Education and Administration.”
It was signed by the superintendent, who also added a handwritten note, “Laurel, You look like you are being very helpful in this picture!”
The actual photo was included, and had been laminated.
Nice touch, I thought.
At the very bottom is a quote by Emerson, “The reward of a thing well done is to have done it.”

True, I was a little surprised that anyone in this county not only knows who Emerson was, but could come up with a suitable quote, but I didn’t dwell on that.

Now we have a laminated copy of one of her photos, that I can say I will save forever.

Yo, Mr. Big Shot Admin!

evilfury — Fri, 12 Mar 2010 20:41:53 +0000

Where is the birthday calendar???
Someone just mentioned that they didn’t realize Luna’s birthday was tomorrow, and I was thinking, “Duh, it’s only right there on the homepage, you big dope.”
I went to check and it’s gone.

TOMORROW IS LUNA’S BIRTHDAY!

We won’t be around all day–have to take Autumn to Bowling Green for a school competition so I won’t write a post. She knows I’ll be thinking about her.

Have a nice weekend everyone.

“I’m in the Paper…Again.”

evilfury — Fri, 12 Mar 2010 17:31:25 +0000

That’s exactly what Laurel said on Wednesday. And, she is understandably not very excited about having her picture in the newspaper because this is like the tenth time.
She is seven years old, and in the second grade, and has had more press than most adults. It’s weird. Let there be a parade, and a crowd of ten thousand people, and the photographer will zoom in on her. Let her school have a play, with a cast of 75 kids, and look there! It’s Laurel, front and center on stage even though she only had one line.
The first few times she was immortalized I did what every parent does: I got tons of copies and cut out the picture/caption and sent it to all my family and friends.
This time, I got the paper two days later and stuck the picture to the fridge with little fanfare. I had to do some juggling to make room for it, and all Laurel said about it was, “Hey, where’s my spelling test?”
At least I didn’t take her test off the fridge to make room for another fucking flyer about Math Night.

Dear Nelson County School System,

evilfury — Fri, 12 Mar 2010 16:52:17 +0000

We are NOT going to your stupid “Family Math Night,” so kindly STOP with the daily reminders sent home with both girls, and the phone messages left on both our home and my cell phone every morning for the last two weeks. I asked the girls weeks ago if they cared about it, and they laughed and basically said, “Yeah, right.”
I do not care if there are 14 teachers participating.
I don’t care that snacks will be provided.
No one wants to spend a Friday night doing math, you fucking morons. If more than three families attend I will eat my goddamned hat.
Now leave us alone and plan something that might actually be interesting and entertaining.
Love, EF

LHOTP Death Pool

evilfury — Thu, 11 Mar 2010 20:24:41 +0000

Since Mr. Big Shot Admin won’t let me change my list, I am making my own damned death pool. Anyone can play, but the contestants have to have been on at least two episodes of Little House on the Prairie.
I am starting with Katherine “Scottie” MacGregor (Harriett Olson) and Richard Bull (Nels Olson.)
They are 85 and 86, respectively, and still enjoying good health.
Doc Baker and Reverend Alden are dead, unfortunately.
Anyone else want to pick?
I will be far more lenient with the rules/changes than Mr. Big Shot Admin.

I Demand a Do Over!

evilfury — Thu, 11 Mar 2010 19:00:48 +0000

Not trying to be a post whore, but I just heard that Merlin Olson died.
DAMN!
Now I am thinking about the rest of the cast of Little House on the Prairie, and wondering if Nels and Doc Baker and all those people are still alive.
Yes, I realize Merlin was a football player before he scored a co-starring role on that show, but that was before my time (as well as off my radar because I have never liked football.)
RIP, Merlin.

Bank of America Sucks Ass

evilfury — Thu, 11 Mar 2010 18:58:23 +0000

Did y’all hear about this shit??
A lady was one month behind in her mortgage payment, and went out of town. Some clown at BoA incorrectly thought she had abandoned the home and sent workers to change the locks, put anti freeze in the toilets and sinks, and padlock the doors.
Oh, and he also took her pet parrot.
BoA admits that a mistake was made, and the woman is suing.
After getting the runaround from them, they finally told her she could pick up her parrot at the bank officer’s crib–80 miles away.
Assholes.

Stinky Soup

evilfury — Thu, 11 Mar 2010 17:34:32 +0000

Since I quit smoking I have gained about four pounds a day, so it was time to bring out the big guns: stinky soup. Y’all may remember the old “cabbage soup” diet from the 80’s–this is a variation of that. It is a vegetable soup with almost no calories, and is pretty damned good once it is all the way cooked.
BUT.
The first step of cooking down cabbage, celery, and onions is revolting. Our house stinks so fucking bad. I hate cabbage, anyway, and to have the smell permeating the house is grossing me the hell out. I had to open the windows.

When boiling the cabbage and stuff in water, I add about ten beef bouillon cubes. I had to laugh because when I was a kid I found a jar of them in my mom’s pantry and thought they were candy because they were so festively wrapped in shiny red foil. I asked her if I could have one, and she said no, and explained that I would not like it and that is was not candy. Naturally, I did not believe her, and popped one in my mouth. BIG mistake. HUGE.

I learned the same hard lesson with baker’s chocolate and almond extract. Hell, to this day, I can barely resist taking a swig of almond or vanilla extract.

So anyway, my plan is to eat nothing but this damned soup until I lose the fifty or so pounds I have gained recently. Since I ate one Girl Scout cookie after another while I made it, I don’t have very high hopes for success.
TOTALLY off subject (!!!) but I have to bitch about the government real quick: we got a notice from the census bureau telling us they will be sending the 2010 census sometime next week. Hello? What a waste of money, effort, time, paper, and everything else imaginable. Everyone knows it is census time. Do we REALLY need a reminder sent through the mail as well as the 800 radio/tv commercials that are airing?? Bunch of fucking morons.

Dear Geo,

evilfury — Wed, 10 Mar 2010 14:11:21 +0000

Over two months since an appearance here?? What the hell is that all about??
As the Official Mascot of KCL, you have a responsibility to your friends and fans to pop up every now and again.
Let’s get this show on the road.
Love, EF

Women Only, Please

evilfury — Mon, 08 Mar 2010 21:54:59 +0000

Autumn got off the bus today and grabbed me by the arm and said, “Mom, I’m wearing a pad!”
I nearly died, but managed to keep my cool and calmly asked her if she had started her period.
She casually goes, “No, false alarm.”
She is insisting that she wear one at all times, though, henceforth, and I am fine with accommodating her. All the girls in her class are talking of nothing else and I remember that excitement, wonder, and dread about the whole business. I used to peruse “Seventeen” magazine and read all the “Your Body and You” articles.
Poor kid has no clue what is in store for her.
Anyway, I’ve given her a bag of panty liners that she can use instead of the industrial strength pad she got at the school office. I can’t believe she had the nerve to go ask for one–I would have DIED if I had to go to the school nurse and ask for a fucking pad. I would sooner have stuffed my panties with toilet paper and gone home sick.
**sigh**
My baby is growing up.